Ministry muses

Recently, many doors for ministry (closely related) were flung open ~ one after another. Everything happened very quickly and suddenly. Soon, I knew mostly what I am going to do next year (and part of this year).

I thank God for the assurance that He would make sure that I don't bum around aimlessly after the end of this year. I did hope for a break, but not too long a break. Bumming around is really fun, relaxing and nice for a while... then I grow depressed because life doesn't seem to have any purpose (which is why my holidays cannot be too long). I hope I don't sound like a workaholic when I say this, but work in healthy doses makes my life meaningful, interesting and fulfilling. Work is a gift from God. We are called to work the Garden in keeping with our spiritual gifts, passions/heart burdens, skills, personalities and life experiences; make things fruitful and multiply. It was not supposed to be a curse - but a good gift from God to Adam - even from the very beginning. 

I am not a person that is comfortable filling up just any position in the ministry just because there is a need - because there will be needs everywhere. This is just my personal conviction. I have tried that before, and I eventually burned out because I was trying hard to be somebody I was not. I was like a cow trying hard to be a horse; in the end I was neither cow nor horse. It was a ministry in which I had to do a lot of visitations as well as share the administrative burdens of the church office. I am fine with occasional visiting. However, my personality is such that I struggle badly when it is my job to visit people day in, day out. (There were days when I didn't feel like I wanted to smile at people and listen to their complaints about life.) My days felt full and long.... but miserably empty. I felt rusty. In the end, I dreaded going to sleep at night because I did not want the days to end - so that I wouldn't have to face the tomorrows. Well, it was a good and humbling experience though. :P I just hope that I had been a blessing to those home-bound aunties I visited as well as the other church staff.

And so, I am thankful for my theological education that enables me to move into the areas of ministry for which I am better suited - for example, writing and discipleship/teaching.

Might be applying for the Methodist's Local Preacher License by this year or next year too.