On God's lovingkindness

God, I wish...
that this delight in the relief
for which I have long yearned ~
could be preserved in a bottle
to be sipped and slowly savoured
when troubled days return ~
If not.... let me drink deeply today
and not lose the awe
of having tasted and seen
that You are a faithful God.

I am filled with gratitude today. Even though there were many downs, God's lovingkindness to me was yet evident ~ through something someone said to me. 

Actually, it was an apology that I had never expected to receive. And I have never asked God to make the person sorry for what he said. Because I never thought that the person had anything to be sorry about. I took his words as good stuff ~ for me to check my heart. He is a good man, really. If what he had said before had put a dent in my ego (haha) or bruised my tender heart, I had certainly forgiven him. 

Life went on. I got to know this person better (and he probably got to know me better too ~ ). Today, in a group discussion that involved us talking about "that time" (some years back) when he was "hard on me" (in his own words), I did jokingly say to the rest that he gave me a hard time back then. 

He turned to me after all that was over and sincerely said that he was sorry. 

While his words took quite some time to sink in, they kept lingering at the back of my mind. I was bewildered. I even asked myself, "Did he really have to apologise?" I felt a certain sort of relief though. A strange relief. 

And then I realised that God had perhaps allowed him to represent a whole lot of people who had said similar things to me in the past (with regards to me leaving medicine and moving into the ministry/theology) ~ things that used to hurt. The worst definitely did not come from this person. But his apology, although uttered very simply, touched me because it felt (to me) as if he was apologising on the behalf all the rest. I never thought that I would need apologies... but somehow, God must have known that I had needed some kind of healing. From words.  

Thank You, Lord. And thank you, person. :)