Shy

How does one overcome the shyness that overwhelms and brings misery?

I only shy away from certain kinds of people when I initially get acquainted with them. The introverts and the feisty. Later (and I mean much, much later  - after a lot of hard work on my part as well as a miracle of some sort), some become my very good friends. I hope vice versa as well!

Feisty people - well, I find aggressiveness and assertiveness quite intimidating when I don't really know the person. It is no rocket science. I can be such a scaredy-cat. Laugh all you want but this is a fact!

As for introverts.... Introverts like myself tend to be not so verbally expressive of our immediate feelings and thoughts. We tend to quietly observe, analyse and process the "data" on our minds. Strategize too, if needed. Perhaps express those thoughts a little later when we've gotten them straightened out - verbally or non-verbally. Since I do that very often myself, I often feel a little nervous when another introvert is quiet, because I have NO IDEA what he/she is ruminating on. I feel more nervous when another introvert says nothing even when I know I have offended him/her - because I always think, "Oh no... it's the calm before the tsunami..." Haha. Apologizing from the bottom of my heart and being pronounced forgiven don't immediately cure my nerves. Yeah, I am silly that way. I feel most nervous when another introvert who usually talks to other people avoids talking to me - because I feel like he/she doesn't like or approve of me in one way or another - even if that is not the case. *Sad* Consequently, I grow even shy-er and start avoiding this person too. Not because I don't like him/her - but because of my own insecurities. I am afraid that I might discover the sad and most-feared truth - that I am despicable to that person. Therefore, avoiding him/her is my defense mechanism to try and protect myself from being hurt.

Well, I can't be likeable to everybody right? :) I need to remember that and not take things so personally. Plus I shouldn't be so perasan and overly sensitive. I have to stop running away from people. Seriously.

I should be myself - an introvert. But I need to overcome my shyness.

Related or unrelated this one... but recently, I realized that most of my close friends are extroverts.