Sunday, 16 June 2013

Sappy Saturday


The past few days have been a mishmash of happenings - from the terrible storm in Penang, arrivals of people back from their travels (Ben included), housework, music rehearsals, movie-dates and dinner with friends, work, work, work (and last-minute cancellation of classes), etc.

I'm mysteriously drained - physically, emotionally and mentally. And this isn't jet-lag!

Med-school graduates usually self-treat when they are manageably unwell. Most do not seek medical attention for ailments that need no surgical solutions - unless their self-treatments backfire. This backfiring happens alot to (1) those who have higher pain tolerance and hence, under-estimate their symptoms; and (2) those who are not very compliant to treatments of any sort. It is therefore true at times, that doctors make the worst patients. I can testify.

I self-treated by downing chocolate. *sugar-high* 

I hardly eat chocolate unless I am self-treating. If I eat loads of chocolate, it is because I have a self-declared license to self-treat. Chocolate is essential for my sanity. *Looks innocent*

Anyway, today brought me to ponder on a hard question (at least for me): Would I really be able to give up my own dreams for the sake of God's calling to... e.g. motherhood? With regard to motherhood, I'd be glad and thankful if we were blessed with children - but motherhood is not only about the happy and highs. Truth be told, it is more often than not, unromantic and hard work. Tears, broken nights, broken dreams, broken hearts and for some, broken backs too. The dramatic and funny part - I actually cried while pondering. I felt... foolishly sad and scared. Haha. (I am sorry if I sounded selfish in any way.) Subsequently, a friend happened to send me a nice, melancholic poem - which made me even sappier - for other reasons.  

Sigh. 

What a Saturday.

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