Forgave

A few days ago, I swallowed my pride (by God's grace and strength) and did something that I'd normally find too difficult to even attempt. 

I finally talked to a certain somebody.

For many years, I had found it hard to love this person. I had found it hard to be happy for her when I should. She had something to do with a past I desperately wanted to but couldn't forget. I did not know how to forgive her even though I knew that I should. I did not know if I had truly forgiven her, even when I told God that I have.

I don't think she realized how much the consequences of her actions had affected me. I don't expect her to know either. And if she doesn't know, all the better. She doesn't need to know. Really.

However, looking at her that day... somehow, I was filled with compassion. And I realized that God's healing had taken place in my heart. I suppose... I could relate a little to the bird which suddenly discovered that it could fly again, long after its wings got broken. Of course, I'm not a bird so I'll never really know. Just supposing.

So I went over and talked to her. While it was very humbling initially, it was still much easier than I thought. I found that I could take an interest in her life and be concerned for her. I realized how silly and insecure I had been. Quite a pleasant conversation we had too, but I was glad when it was over - only because I could then quietly savour the new freedom I was experiencing from a courageous act (at least on my part) and thank God for His love and help.

Indeed, God is a God of reconciliation.